Bonaire- Dutch Antilles

Even as we approached Bonaire barely after sunrise, it was obvious that it was a smaller island than Aruba, with a tiny pier that stretched only about a fifth of the length of the ship. The captain expertly turned the ship and used the side thrusters to align the “door” to the gangway perfectly in the center of the small pier. From the deck I could see vast blue sky and beautiful water and between the two were small brightly colored buildings stretching several blocks back from the pier. I was glad to see a smaller town with the pier built right alongside it. Our dive was to meet early today on the small pier so we had no time to waste. This was a day we had particularly looked forward to because Bonaire is a world renowned dive spot. But after yesterday’s somewhat disappointing experience in its neighboring island of Aruba, I was a little more guarded in my expectation. We met the dive master on the pier and then hopped onto a dive boat docked just a few yards from the ship. We climbed over a large tire mounted on the pier to protect the hulls of boats and stepped across an expanse of water to balance on the outer rim of the boat and get in. The captain apologized for having to enter the boat in a manner he jokingly referred to as our agility test. But this seemed like the first small adventure of the day and only added to the fun in my eyes. We made a short trip to the “Dive Friends” shop about half a mile down the waterfront and went in to get what gear we’d need. The group was split into 2 for each of 2 available boats and we chose the smaller group (and hence the smaller boat), with the hope that a smaller group would more quickly develop a friendly atmosphere and a more fun trip. After we checked our gear, we dressed for the dive (a small dive boat leaves very little room for that once onboard). We boarded our boat and met our captain Ron and crew Bjorn and Richard, the first 2 being from Holland and the third from England. The boat ride to our first site was breathtaking. With more elevation on this island than in Aruba, we could see small houses perched on hillsides to take advantage of the spectacular view. Missing were large resorts, indeed  there were long stretches of beach with no development at all. From our vantage point, the beaches didn’t look as expansive, but they were also far less crowded. There were few palm trees and the effect was not as lush as some islands. The lack of rainfall here is apparent in the arid landscape and numerous cacti.

What makes diving unique in Bonaire is that the reefs are very close to the shore. For this reason, all water surrounding the island has been declared a Marine Sanctuary and is fiercely protected. Much of the road around the perimeter of the island runs alongside these beaches. Just off the beaches, about 100-300 feet away, yellow buoys are visible. Each of these buoys mark one of the 90+ dive sites surrounding the island. Divers typically carry their equipment in the back of a car and stop wherever the mood hits them to dive. Of course, this diving does require a little familiarity with the island and a good bit of dive experience (along with a dive computer) to do it safely. Since this doesn’t describe a first time 1 day only stop, we chose to go with dive-masters who are familiar with the island, and we took a boat to several sites not accessible by land. The sites are very close to shore, but a part of the shore not accessible by vehicle. Unlike yesterday’s crowded dives at the few dive sites near Aruba, the sheer number of dive sites in Bonaire coupled with the smaller population of both residents and tourists, mean these dive sites felt remote and unspoiled. As if we were the only people diving.

When everyone had equipment on and was ready, we took turns doing backward rolls off the side of the boat. Smaller boats with no open flat decks on the back require this entry method. At 82 degrees, I could have just floated around all day in the clear turquoise water looking at the untouched beach and landscape so close to us. Well, at least until I took a peek underwater. I wish I could find words to describe the beauty of a coral reef in crust all water with several hundred feet of visibility. I’m always struck by the creativity of a creator that has placed things in the water that do not resemble anything on land and that are so strikingly beautiful it takes my breath away every time. The sheer diversity of both the coral and the sea life mean you could do a thousand dives at beautiful reefs and never tire of it because it’s different every time. The underwater landscape sloped gently away from the island and a huge variety of colorful coral was crowded onto it as far as the eye could see. Among the coral are schools of fish so thick you can hardly see to the other side of them and smaller solitary fish of every shape, size, and brilliant color imaginable. My favorite are the fish with 5 or 6 colors on their body, usually in unexpected patterns. Every fish swims in a little bit of a different way, some dart from place to place, some glide smoothly, and some flutter in ways i wouldn’t  normally have even associated with fish. One of the loveliest ones may be the lion fish. Ironically, these poisonous fish are not native to the Caribbean, they are damaging to the reef system and are removed at every opportunity.

I’m always a little disappointed when the dive-master signals that it’s time to ascend. We were all excited and chattered about the dive, I love the atmosphere on a dive boat after a great dive. We were all taken with the beauty of the reef and its residents and were anxious to talk about it. Our surface interval gave us time to get to know some of our crew. Richard (from England) has lived on the island about 5 years. The cost of living is a little high (since everything must be imported), but he has no regrets about moving here. He works as a dive-master and also has a sailboat that he runs charters on. It’s all really just to support his dream of Caribbean living, and he counts it all as being worth it.

Our second dive was no less spectacular than the first. Having seen a reef and the sea life before never takes away from the awe of seeing it again, just as having seen a sunset never makes the next one less beautiful. We were a little sad to see our dives end and to return to the ship, but we were glad to have time to go ashore and see some of the island.

We had to walk only about a hundred feet off the ship to see local artisans selling their crafts. These was not your typical tourist market you see on most other islands. No brightly painted paper mache’ parrots from China or Mexican blankets were on sale. Instead there were bath salts made from the island’s salt mines, alcohol made from a cactus, and gorgeous hand made glass pendants and jewelry. Several painters were also selling original artwork, and giving demonstrations of their technique and talent at the same time. Past the market we walked onto the Main Street. The name of the city and the streets are Dutch and completely unpronounceable to us. As far as we could see were brightly colored colonial style buildings holding boutiques, drugstores, clothing stores, and restaurants. We wandered down the street, in and out of various shops, admiring the buildings. We walked through one long row of shops that led to the harbor. Here, small cafés lined the waterfront, each offering a breathtaking view from their tables.

In case it’s not obvious, I was quite taken with Bonaire. We sat in a small open air cafe near the pier and used their wifi to FaceTime the girls. We waited until the very last minute we were due to return to the ship.

I hope this is not the last I see of Bonaire. With its quaint town, friendly people, and fantastic diving, I’m officially adding it to my wish list of places to go for a longer visit…

Bonaire's best view
Bonaire’s best view

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Diving just off shore
Diving just off shore

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Puffer fish
Puffer fish
Blue Tang
Blue Tang

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Dive Friends
Dive Friends
Streets of Bonaire
Streets of Bonaire
Halloween parade
Halloween parade
Port of Bonaire
Port of Bonaire

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Aruba

Aruba was a little bit of an unusual port day because we would be there from 10-8 instead of the usual 8-5. The first thing apparent about Aruba was that it was mostly flat with fewer trees and there were houses and buildings as far as the eye could see. And even one area of high rise resorts off in the distance. Our dive didn’t meet till 1 so we got off and walked into town. We found a small market and several high end malls with boutiques and retailers like Michael Kors and Kate Spade. We quickly deduced that this was not just a quaint little Caribbean island. We walked along the beautiful waterfront of the harbor with every imaginable size of boat docked in it. No matter what’s on the island, they all have the beautiful water view.

We made our way back to the ship for lunch and to get ready for our dive. Diving is an equipment heavy sport and preparing is not always easy. Sometimes I start to wonder if it’s all worth it, but that only lasts until I jump into the warm turquoise water and see the beauty around me, and the thought never enters my mind again.

Once the dive group got together, we made our way just up the pier to our dive boat. This dive had about 17 divers, which is a fairly large group. We cruised along the perimeter of the island and saw vast white beaches in front of posh high rise resorts and gleaming white villas with terra cotta rooflines, all crowding the waterfront. The boat ride out was beautiful, and it’s always a time when you can feel the excitement in the air like electricity as everyone gets ready for the dive. We all struggled into our skin suits or wet suits and set up our regulator and BCD on the tanks, checked the air and made sure the equipment was working properly, and finally gOT our masks and fins. Everyone loaded their personal amount of weight to their BCD and we all sat back to the inevitable chatter about other dives and dive spots while waiting for the moment we can enter the water. When we arrived the dive-master, with her cool South African accent, did a safety briefing, talking about what marine life we could expect to see, and gave us an overview of the dive we were about to do. This dive was a 400 foot German warship that was sunk during WWII. She warned us that the metal has weakened over the years and part of the ship is collapsing in on itself and cautioned us not to enter the boat at all. We were split into 2 groups and ttook turns entering the water with a giant stride off the back of the boat to follow our dive-master, Manuel.

Although the water here is as beautiful as anywhere in the Caribbean, the visibility was not as good as some islands. So with only about 50 feet of visibility we didn’t see the ship at first, but as we swam further it looms large in front of us. The metal is only visible in spots as coral and saltwater have covered or corroded it. The dive-master in front of us approached the ship and swam directly into it. What?! Is this really the dive-master we were assigned to? Did he not hear the warning about entering the ship? I thought for a moment we had somehow been separated and ended up with another group. I looked around and thought I recognized everyone else from the boat, so I followed him in. It turns out we were only entering a hole in the stern and came right back out through another hole. I’m still not sure if it’s a great idea, but we didn’t enter the interior of the ship. The ship was huge and was indeed partially collapsed. It can be hard, with such a large and old wreck, to make out what I’m seeing. But I recognized the large mast lying on the sand and the deck railing was also apparent throughout. We emerged from the 50- 60 foot dive in about 45 minutes.

After an appropriate surface interval and a short boat ride, we arrived at another wreck. This one was much smaller and more deteriorated than the first. Colorful fish swan around the wreck, taking advantage of the nooks and crannies to hide. The dive was otherwise similar to the first. For me, wreck diving doesn’t compare to reef diving, which is not plentiful here.

The boat returned us to our pier and we spent a little time wandering through the market on the pier and took advantage of the wifi to FaceTime with our girls and for me to post a blog (running a few days behind because of lack of wifi).

We returned to the ship and watched it pull away. We don’t often see this in the dark and the lights on the island made Aruba look like a big city, which I guess it is in some respects. I couldn’t help but find my mind coming back to Natalie Holloway several times today. I wonder now what was the attraction of coming to this island for high school graduates? The beaches look fabulous,no doubt, but one of the main attractions here seems to be the night life, which is exactly where her trouble began.

Of course my impression of an island is unavoidably colored by the quality of the diving. But almost as important is the pace of island life. I prefer the less developed islands with small local stores as opposed to high end retailers in a marble and glass mall. And an island with a very “active night life” also doesn’t impress me. So Aruba, while beautiful in its own way, will not be added to my wish list of islands to return to. Maybe tomorrow our stop in another of the Dutch Antilles, Bonaire, will be different. After all part of the fun is seeing new places and doing things, no matter what the outcome.

 

Port of Aruba

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Grand Cayman (plus one)

 

Christian's largest stingray catch
Christian’s largest stingray catch
Sunrise over Grand Cayman
Sunrise over Grand Cayman

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I DID NOT mean to get so close to this sting ray
I DID NOT mean to get so close to this sting ray

Christian’s largest stingray catch

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Stingrays surrounding the snorkelers
Stingrays surrounding the snorkelers

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Adult Turtles
Adult Turtles
Ice sculpture at Gala Buffet
Ice sculpture at Gala Buffet

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Port Day mornings are usually busy. Everyone trying to get breakfast, pack a backpack for the day and get ashore. Ports where we must use a tender (a small boat to shuttle people ashore because the port is not deep enough to accommodate the large ship) are always more hectic. Times like this are what some people hate about cruises, the hurry up and wait lines. But most people are very patient and polite, knowing this is a natural consequence of choosing to vacation with about 3000 other passengers.

So we finally made it onto Grand Cayman and found the bus that would take us to our chosen destinations today. First, we rode over to a harbor just a few minutes away to board yet another boat. Then that boat took us out to the sandbar that is home to the popular attraction of Stingray City.

Stingray City is actually a large sandbar stretching about half a mile out from the island. Here stingrays have been being hand fed for almost 50 years and have become very tame (and very large). Tourists flock here by the droves to have the unique opportunity to touch, hold, and feed giant stingrays. The stingrays don’t seem to be put off by the number of people, their numbers actually appeared to grow as more people populated the sandbar. Many years ago, we visited Grand Cayman and dove near this same sandbar with our scuba group. I don’t have fond memories of the experience, when we were fully submerged the sting rays were free to glide across our faces and heads. But standing in the 4-5 foot water of the sandbar was a little more comfortable for me. Not to say that I wasn’t at first unnerved by a 6 foot stingray rubbing against me. Their mouths are underneath their bodies and this is how they are fed, so they are constantly sliding their silly soft bellies over any part of your body they happen to find in search of food. The stingrays are docile and will allow you to hold and stroke them. The guides also gave squid to those brave souls who wanted to feed them (which didn’t include me). By the time we were ready to leave, I was actually enjoying the experience. The rays are impossibly silky, and once I accepted that they weren’t going to hurt me, I was able to relax and have fun.

After our boat returned to the dock, we boarded another bus to take us to the Cayman Turtle Farm. We entered a beautifully landscaped complex of colorful buildings that served as educational and breeding centers. A large enclosure in the center of the complex held over 300 adult turtles and served as the breeding tank. These turtles were enormous, each weighing 300- 400 pounds. The attached sand beach allows the females to lay eggs (numbering 50-150) in nests every 10 days for the 3 month breeding season. The eggs are then transferred to one of the building and kept at constant temperatures. The higher the temperature of the eggs, the more female turtles; and the lower the temperature, the more males. But next came the best part! (In my opinion at least). The tanks where the adolescent turtles were kept. We were actually allowed to hold and pet them! I love sea turtles, and we’ve seen them often on our dives. In Barbados, they are friendly and even will swim very near you. But to hold this small sea turtle was more than I had ever imagined I’d get to do.. Their strong little flippers would push against our hands while they craned their necks to look around. We reluctantly left,but we came back before we left the park, we just couldn’t get enough. Next was the lagoon where we could snorkel with some mid-sized turtles. They weren’t as friendly as their cousins in Barbados and tried to keep clear of us. After a little snorkeling, it was on to feed the big guys (and gals) in the breeding tank. Those huge turtles were fairly fighting each other for the “turtle chow” we bought to give them. And then a last visit to the adolescent tanks of course.

It was finally time to return to the ship. We didn’t have much time to do anything else, so we walked down the street and found a hot spot to check email and it was back to the ship for an extremely late lunch.

My overall impression of Grand Cayman is of the most Americanized of the Caribbean islands we’ve seen. That may be the highest praise to some, and I would’ve loved to have spent years working here if I was in banking and finance. But to me, I love the islands that have evidence a very different culture and way of life than the one I’m used to. The island is flat but beautiful, the beaches are nice and of course the water is fabulous. Once back in the boat, we talked to a few people who spent the day scuba diving, and we didn’t find any who had much praise for it. This had also been our experience here, nice diving but nothing spectacular. But to each his own, this is surely paradise for the thousands of people who have chosen to live here.

This is one of my favorite things about cruising, getting a peek at islands we never would’ve seen otherwise, and then finding one we’d like to go back and visit for longer. We have 5 more ports, 4 of which we’ve never visited, so maybe one of those will seem to be heaven on earth to us. But the visits will no doubt be exciting either way.

The next day at sea was uneventful. Unless you consider, as I do, spending hours looking at the most beautiful ocean in the world thrilling. We did get to tour the galley in the afternoon. It continues to fascinate me to see the workings of such a large operation. Mostly, a restful and peaceful day. We didn’t take nearly enough of these when we were younger, maybe we didn’t need as many. But now I find it helps us tremendously in every way. This cruise made today a throwback day and brought back the midnight gala buffet. Well we couldn’t miss it! But rich food after midnight is not always a great idea, so we mostly took advantage of the eye candy and took pictures (mostly….)

Hurricane Patricia – our uninvited guest

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The rain held off during our visit to Glaveston and even during our initial hours on the ship. But when Patricia caught up to us, she was angry. All night and most of the next day we saw intermittent rain, rough seas, and people staggering around like they were drunk thanks to the rocking of the ship. Honestly, it’s not the roughest water we’ve ever been in, but it did keep us inside the first day. An uneventful but restful day with plenty of time to go to the gym and read. Our next day at sea dawned with only a few white, puffy clouds and a brilliant sun over that impossibly blue Caribbean Sea. We had finally outrun even the outermost bands of Patricia.

Breakfast in the dining room took a lot longer than it should’ve, but it gave us ample time to talk with the fascinating couple sitting next to us. In their late 80’s, Randall and Joann were an adorable couple from Amarillo, Texas who had been married only 2 weeks! They decided to get married mostly so they could travel together easily. They had done some trial trips while engaged to see if they were a good match. Joann commented that when some people were surprised they were traveling together, being unmarried, she asked them what did they think was going on with a couple in their late 80’s?! They are avid cruisers, thanks to Randal, who started his “cruise passenger career” long before he knew Joann as 1 of 4 guests onboard a working cargo ship where he was allowed to hang out in the bridge and even got a lesson on turning the ship from the captain. They seemed to have an endless supply of funny travel anecdotes to share, and we probably could’ve listened to them all day.

After breakfast we were eager to get outside. Reading and relaxing on the deck has become one my favorite pastimes while at sea. There’s something about that blue water and fresh salty air that refreshes me like nothing else. I’m not sure if I could get tired of sitting and gazing across the water.

We did, of course eventually get up. After lunch we attended a question and answer session with a few members of the crew. Anytime we have a chance to learn more about how they manage a ship this big we are there. Being a details person, it’s almost overwhelming to hear of all the things that go into it. The audience at the question and answer session were pretty typical of the this cruise in general. At least 80% of the ship’s passengers are over 70. When we spot someone close to our age, we actually point them out since it is such a rarity. I thought I wouldn’t enjoy a crowd with this mix, but I hate honestly feel younger than I have in a while- lol. And with age comes experience and usually a few good stories. I don’t believe there are many uninteresting people in the world, everyone has a story different than my own, you just have to ask the right questions.

Tomorrow we dock in Grand Cayman, financial capital of the Caribbean, but banking is not on our to do list. That blue water is calling me….

A few days in Galveston

Galveston in general reminds me of a little bit of New Orleans mixed with a larger portion of Key West, but with a generally more run down feel. Don’t get me wrong, we’ve enjoyed it, but Texas doesn’t compare to Florida as far as beach towns go.

Nonetheless, our few days in Galveston have been a great start to our trip! Hurricane Patricia is already making her presence felt here in the form of strong winds and angry seas. Our hotel is perched right on Seawall Boulevard and we have a front row seat to the constantly rolling whitecaps and the occasional daredevil with his surfboard ignoring the red flags in search of a perfect wave. And the inside of our hotel is no less interesting with its 2 interior brick walls and 1970’s decor. It is very clean but ridiculously outdated. But we can take almost anything for a couple of nights, and if we were in Belize we would probably think this room was not bad at all!

Our time here seems to have been centered around the history of the island, which is really fascinating. The railroad museum was a look into the past- not just of trains but of the passengers who rode them. Seeing private train cars (owned by the wealthy like private jets are today) were the most intriguing to me. Christian loved it all, like life sized train sets for a grown up “little” boy.

Our subsequent tour of the Moody Mansion was no less interesting. A grand 28,000 square foot mansion owned by one of the most prominent families in Texas. The house was breathtaking, but it was the stories of life 120 years ago that really captured my attention. Our tour guide brought the stories to life as if she’d been there, and the 2 plus hours we spent there flew by.

We took the obligatory free ferry ride to Bolivar Peninsula from Galveston. The ferry ride seems to be most well known for the scores of dolphins you see in the harbor, and we weren’t disappointed. A few of them even did some flips up and out of the water for us. A drive through the beach town of Crystal Beach on Bolivar Peninsula proved less impressive. For those of us spoiled by the beach towns of Florida, the beach and water both left something to be desired. But the houses all built on stilts to escape the inevitable flood waters were multicolored and plentiful.

We are looking forward to boarding our ship tomorrow. We’ve never been on a repositioning cruise. We will begin in Galveston and end up in San Juan, Puerto Rico in 11 days. The only hitch tomorrow may come from Hurricane Patricia, thankfully we are nowhere near landfall, but the bands from a storm that big will affect us for sure. So I’ll choose to look at it as another (unexpected) adventure.

Angry gulf from our hotel room
Angry gulf from our hotel room
Railroad Museum and Moody Mansion
Railroad Museum 
 Moody Mansion
Moody Mansion
Railroad museum
Railroad museum

Travel Eve – is there such a thing as too much planning?

planning picI find my self on the eve of our next adventure and I am as excited as ever. Although I have NO doubt this trip will turn out to be fabulous no matter what, I tend to romanticize a trip before I take it. I can envision moonlight strolls and dancing the night away followed by sleeping in before going to brunch. Less glamorous dreams include going to the gym everyday and working up a sweat for at least an hour before I go to dinner and triumphantly turn down the chocolate melting cake that I would never dream of putting on my thighs.

Romantic or not, most of these things probably will not happen. My husband doesn’t dance, I tend to fall asleep by 9 pm, and I’ve already had a few dreams of eating (not rejecting) that chocolate melting cake. I so love the planning process of a trip, I am into details and I have a folder with every reservation, confirmation, and any bits of information  that pertain to our trip. But my mind also likes the planning of my dream activities, and if I’m not careful I can actually set myself up for disappointment when they don’t happen. The lesson I’ve learned (and really that I’m STILL learning) is to let go of those expectations and let things happen naturally.  It’s great that I have our rental car confirmation in hand and that I’ve researched the quickest way to get to our hotel, but to plan our conversations is always  counterproductive. (I even plan Christian’s side of it- although I don’t provide him with the script- can’t he read my mind?)

Spontaneity  is a life lesson that I’ve learned very slowly and the hard way over the years. I find if I can let go of my pre- conceived notions of exactly how things should go, the result is often beyond what I could’ve dreamed it would be. Our funniest travel stories came from circumstances I couldn’t have foreseen. But I know sometimes things don’t go perfectly, some days my stomach hurts from all the chocolate cake and I’m too tired to go to the gym. But magical moments of watching the sunset and talking about our dreams for the future make it all worthwhile, and they make me glad I wasn’t trying to stick to my schedule, which would have ruined the moment.

So today I’m going to take a deep breath and recheck (4 times) that I’ve got passports, all my confirmations, and all the things on my packing list. And even while I feel the jolt of excitement running through me, I’m going to try to remember to let go of my preconceived notions of how every moment is going to play out. After all, adventure comes when you let the unexpected happen.

The Secret of Change Is to Focus All of Your Energy, Not on Fighting the Old, But on Building the New

girls leaving girls leaving2

 

 

 

Yes, as of this week both of my children officially moved away to college. Yet another milestone to add to my collection. Really, I am weary of milestones. In the past 2 years (since my oldest graduated from high school) my life seems to be made up of one milestone after another punctuated by small stretches of “normal” life. And now as we come to one of the biggest milestones of a parent’s life, I find it distasteful. Now it’s not the milestone itself I have a problem with, both children going off to college and moving away from home is a natural thing that we have  been expecting since they were born (after all, nobody is happy is they NEVER leave home). My argument is with the title bestowed on us on this momentous occasion, EMPTY NESTER.

I think this is perhaps the worst description given to any phase of life. Over the past 25 years I’ve worn many labels as a Mom- new parent, school volunteer, room mother, chaperone,  coach, and homeschool supervisor (only to name a few). I can handle any of these monikers, they are descriptive but not negative. But now I am coming to be identified as an “empty nester.”

In the same breath that my daughter is wished well at her high school graduation, said well-wisher turns to me and says “oh, and you’ll be an empty nester, how are you going to handle that?” Here’s my problem, we tend to just neglect to mention to the high school graduate that in the next year they will probably deal with some measure of homesickness, social awkwardness, terror at taking college level tests, lack of money, and/or smelly dorm rooms (and subsequent realization that they have to do their own cleaning and laundry). And we do this because we don’t want to scare them, we know  that there are lots of scary things about the first year of college and being away from home, but we want to focus on the positive (and there will also be lots of that). We say, “this is such an exciting time for you”, and “I can’t wait to see what God has in store for you in the years ahead”, and “I know you are going to do big things”. That’s great and we definitely should be encouraging, but why do we then turn around and focus on the negative for the graduates’ parents? This can be an exciting time for me too! I know I am not supposed to say that, it makes me sound like a bad parent, but it’s true. Don’t get me wrong, I already miss my children. There is no denying that fresh shot of pain I feel every time I realize they won’t be home today. (And I completely empathize with every parent in this situation). But sadness is natural when we finish a chapter in life we have dearly loved, we must discover how to best deal with it and begin the process of moving on.

Personally, the fact is that I am ready to embrace this change and make the best of it. Just like it will do the college freshman no good to sit around and wish they didn’t have to clean their own toilet, it will do me no good to sit around and wish my children were still young. Because that is the crux of the matter. It’s not just that they are going to college, what we really hate is the fact that they grew up at all. It’s not necessarily the beautiful, intelligent young women who are my daughters that I miss the most. I miss the little girls who ran to jump in my lap when their feelings had been hurt, the little girls who wanted me to watch them jump of the diving board or practice their dance for the recital because their sense of accomplishment came through the strength of my approval. But now I’ve done my job, they know their accomplishments don’t depend on anyone’s approval of them, I’ve taught them that and now I must let them live it out.

The question I can’t help but ask is, why are we so resistant to change? Resisting this change has become so common and expected that we may even think if a parent is not upset that their children are growing up and leaving home that their parental love is in question. We’ve been working for this outcome since the day we had children. We raised them to go out into the world and make their own way. So why is this positive thing come to have such negative connotations that it was given a negative title? Empty suggests the lack of something, but I don’t’ lack anything. I have been preparing my children for this. And now that it is here I am excited for them, how can I regret it?  Do the years go too fast? YES! Is there a way for me to slow them down? NO! And I have learned (the hard way) that trying to hold onto something that is over does not work. Not only does it not work, when our focus is on what is in the past then we are in danger of missing the excitement and adventure waiting for us in the next chapter. Because no matter how hard it is to turn the page of a finished chapter, I know from experience that there will be unexpected joy in the next chapter as well. And the present is the only place I can truly find joy. Memories are invaluable and precious, but the present moment is the only place I can live.

I don’t believe I was always so good with change, but I have probably experienced more change in the past 5 years than I did in the 40 years before that. Much of that change was obvious, but even more was internal- the kind really only God and I know about. And He taught me in the midst of the hardest changes of my life to look forward and not back. The hard part is that going forward means enduring the pain (albeit temporary) of turning that last page of a chapter you absolutely loved. But the payoff of fully living in the new is always better than trying to linger on that last page.

The quintessential question that all “empty nesters” get is “What in the world will you do without any kids at home?” I find that question a little funny. I seem to remember stern warnings when I was pregnant with my first child that I had no idea how children were going to disrupt married life as I’d come to know it. No more romantic dinners, no more sleeping in on Saturdays, and no more spur of the moment dinner dates alone or with friends. I often think of these (all too true) warnings I got 20+ years ago, and so now my answer to what I’m going to do is; romantic dinners, sleeping in on Saturday, and spur of the moment dinner dates (either alone or with friends). Sometimes the recipient of my answer (which I always frame in a positive way)  almost  seems disappointed that I didn’t mourn for my children’s presence or lament that my husband and I don’t know each other anymore without children. But I am only being honest. There are freedoms we made a decision to forgo for 20+ years when we had children, and it was worth it 100 percent! But now we find ourselves in the same position as when we were first married, learning a new daily routine and a new dynamic in our home.  And we are no more hesitant to dive into this new change than we were as newlyweds.

So I would appreciate everyone not using the negative term “empty nester” (because I’m sure cultural change is that easy;-). The question is what label should we use? (Because we are attached to our labels.) I have yet to think of a catchy term that describes it. Maybe “graduate parents” or “successful parents” (although that one is not specific enough – you can be a successful parent long before this milestone). I don’t know, maybe we can just be a happily married couple, maybe it’s time to take back a label that doesn’t refer to our children. Maybe we can accept that we are just “Christian and Gina” and that we are OK with not being connected to our kids in every label we carry. We are young (or young-ish) people who have years of adventure ahead of them, some of that adventure will involve our kids and one day grandkids, but some will just be us- and I’m really learning to be OK with that!

May 26 – “On earth there is no Heaven, but there are pieces of it.” Jules Renard

Today would be our most adventurous and busiest day in Puerto Rico, and today we would glimpse a few of those pieces of heaven on earth. They are found in nature of course, God’s own handiwork.

After our scrumptious continental breakfast and coffee made by our wonderful hostess Ana, we found a cab to take us to the airport to pick up our rental car. You never know what you’re going to get with cab rides. This time our driver seemed to be taking on the role of Puerto Rican thug. He sat so low in his seat that from directly behind him, I had an unobstructed view out the front windshield (which was not necessarily a good thing). He was on his cell phone the entire trip, speaking in rapid fire Spanish. That lasted until we approached the airport, he then said (in clear English), “let me call you back- I’m lost.” What?! How does a cab driver get lost at the airport? And why did he choose to say only that in English? He explained that they have moved the car rental agencies recently, so he was confused. Right. But he finally deposited us in the right spot. We went inside and claimed the Jeep Wrangler we had reserved.

Fortunately, since Puerto Rico is a US territory, we could use our cell phones without extra change which meant we could use our maps app to guide us to the rain forest. Unfortunately, we would soon find out that our map did not seem to know where the visitors center was. Once out of San Juan we were quickly passing through towns nestled between heavily forested mountains. We took an exit when the map suggested and took what turned out to be a scenic 45 minute detour through winding mountain roads. We saw some great scenery, but when we finally found someone to ask, he told us we were in the wrong area of the national forest. We then actually starting using directions from an article I had printed out and brought with us. We haven’t used written directions in a while, but they were infinitely more helpful in this situation.

El Yunque (pronounced ell June-kaye) is a nationally protected rain forest, actually the only one on US soil. It is also on the list of the world’s 7 wonders of nature. We stopped first in the visitors center, which was itself a beautiful building with exhibits designed to teach about the rainforest ecosystem. We also grabbed a sandwich at the snack bar. Our next stop was the information desk for maps to the park and hiking trails. We set off in our jeep to see the beauty we were promised at the visitors center.

Our first stop as we ascended the mountain was La Coca falls. It was a high cliff face right beside the road. We were able to pick our way through boulders to get a closer view of the beautiful falls. Although very tall, there were only small streams of water flowing over the fall thanks to recent drought like conditions in Puerto Rico. The thick canopy of trees only added to the beauty and I quickly fell in love with El Yunque. We seemed to be in an enchanted forest where we heard calls of birds and water rushing over rocks and gazed at trees and flowers as far as the eye could see. Our next stop was an old observation tower. We climbed the 8-story tall structure and were rewarded with an absolutely breathtaking view. Not only could we see rain forest covered mountains, we also had a panoramic view of the Atlantic Ocean. We could even makes out tiny white caps just past the tall buildings visible along the coastline. The blue of the sky almost blended with the color of the ocean, the blue being only a few shades lighter as the eye traveled upward. I could have stayed and enjoyed that view for the rest of the day, but we had more to explore. Our next stop would take us to a hiking trail to the La Mina falls. We parked above the falls and hiked about 40 minutes down the side of the mountain to reach the falls. The trail primarily consisted of steps made into the side of the mountain broken up by a thin trail made of stone and concrete. The infrastructure of this rain forest was already a far cry from the one we visited in Belize. The hike toward the falls took us along the creek which would feed the fall. The creek flowing sharply downhill over large boulders was beautiful in its own right, and we stopped several times for pictures and to climb out onto the rocks. We knew we were approaching the falls as the sound of rushing water increased and as we stepped from behind a stand of trees we saw the clearing where the waterfall fell majestically into the pool below. We were not the only hikers here today, and the pool below the fall was full of people enjoying the spectacular view and the chilly water. We stayed only for a few minutes to take in the view. A 40 minute hike down the mountain meant a “slightly” more challenging trip going back up. Might as well get started. We mostly kept up a good pace on what felt like 6,000 steps we had to climb. The sections that were merely sharp inclines became a welcome relief between steps, and the rocks alongside the narrow path became a place to rest as we let hikers descending have the right of way (it was less about being kind as it was about catching our breath). We finally made it back to the parking area in a little less time than it took to get down. We were tired but the glow from the experience of the rain forest made it all worthwhile. We drove the remaining few kilometers to the end of the road, from here you could hike a couple of hours to the summit, a feat which we (thankfully) did not have time for. We made our way slowly back down the mountain and back onto the small highway along the eastern coast. We had a little time before we were scheduled to be in Los Croabas, which was less than 15 miles away, so we decided to ride along the coast and see another town. We rode to Punta Santiago and wove our way through the small roads of a town that did not seem have been touched by tourism. We stopped at the beach area which was only occupied by a few families. A thin line of sea grass formed a wavy line along the palm tree lined beach. The water, while indeed blue, was a deep color and not the turquoise associated with the Caribbean. This eastern side of the island is technically on the Atlantic, but we were getting closer to the Carribean as we headed southeast. After a few pictures, we headed back to Fajardo to find something to eat. After grabbing a quick bite we were off to Los Croabas and the bioluminescence lagoon.

Once we found our way to the lagoon it took a few minutes to find Bio Island- the company we were booked with. Mostly kayaks are allowed by 10 licensed kayak companies but 2 companies are licensed to take motorized boats. From what I understand they were the first 2 who found a way to make boats work in the water that can be as shallow as 18 inches and no more license were given after those 2. Having read horror stories about hundreds of inexperienced kayakers paddling through a narrow mangrove lined canal in the dark, I chose the boat. Our guide Mario was very knowledgeable and soon had us well informed about dinoflagellates. When we started our trip on the small flat bottom 6 passenger boat the sun was just beginning to set. We headed for a narrow canal in between thick mangroves. The shallow water, while not particularly blue, was crystal clear and we could see large tarpon swimming near the protection of the tangled mangrove roots. We entered what felt like a tunnel of trees, so close in some places that I wondered if our boat would be able to get through. Mario took the time to explain that the dinoflagellates were microscopic organisms that are photosynthetic and so in the shallow water here they absorb light all day. When they are disturbed they put off a glow as a defense mechanism. These organisms can be found in many places but typically the concentration of them is too low to detect the light with human eye. Here, however, it is because of the unique way the mangroves isolate the lagoon that the concentration has become very high (about 750,000 of them per gallon of water). After the sun sets the glow can be seen whenever the water is disturbed. It last only a few seconds so the water must be disturbed over and over to continue to see the glow. After Mario’s explanation we were even more excited to see them. The boat finally emerged into a lagoon roughly round in shape, measuring about half a mile in diameter. The groups of kayaks had all retreated to various spots near the entrance to the canal, but since we were in a motorized boat, we continued further into the lagoon. Thick mangroves surrounded us with taller Palm trees visible behind them. The sun had just set and the sky was still brilliant with oranges and pinks silhouetting the distant Palm trees. Very soon it was almost completely dark and long poles were passed out to us so we could disturb the water. We all began swirling our poles in the water and the excitement was palpable as we all “oohed” and “aahed” in amazement. My camera was able to capture a decent image and Mario explained that it is a hard thing for cameras to capture except on very particular settings. Everywhere we dipped our pole into the water an explosion of neon blue light suddenly surrounded it. The boat moved slowly through the lagoon as we took in the awesome sight. The captain invited us to lean down and try the same thing with our hands, and when I splashed in the water and quickly withdrew my hand, drops of glowing water that lasted only a second ran through my fingers. When it was finally time to head back toward the canal, Mario stemmed our disappointment at leaving with a promise of yet another perspective of the dinoflagellates in the canal. Once inside the mangrove lined canal where no moonlight could penetrate because of the trees, the glow became brighter and water splashed up in the air with a paddle would glow like a neon blue fountain. As I turned to look behind the boat there was a large glowing circle following us as the motor churned the water. Just when we thought we could not possibly be amazed any further, Mario pointed out small white dots of light in the mangrove trees themselves. What we were seeing were bugs called click beetles whose eyes actually glow! (I’ve since looked all this up, and it is indeed all true even though it sounds like fiction.) Christian spotted movement in the water and the captain followed the large stingray he had spotted with his flashlight as he glided beside the water right alongside our boat. Mario used his flashlight to show us several giant iguanas living in the mangrove trees. Emerging from the canal was like coming out of a dream. Did we really just see glowing water? This may be one of the most unbelievable things I’ve ever seen, really because it doesn’t fit in with what I thought I knew about water. Although I’ve heard of this place before, I had somehow imagined the glow would be faint or at least certainly not spectacular neon blue!

After getting off the boat, we made our way back to our jeep in the dark. We all agreed this had been the a great day, seeing all these amazing things in nature makes you think about the endless creativity of God and the magnificence of it all.

Tomorrow is the day everyone dreads, the end of vacation and a long day of travel. But somehow this trip has been so wonderful that even the arduous day of travel ahead can’t curb my excitement. This has been a week we won’t soon forget.

Puerto Rico has been a pleasant surprise to me. The rainforest, the bioluminescent lagoon, Old San Juan, the beaches, and the impressive fortress were all amazing. And according to locals, this is only the tip if the iceberg when it comes to what there is to do here. The sprawling city of San Juan surprised me with its metropolitan area population of 2 1/2 million. San Juan and the small towns outside of it remind me of Miami and the small towns leading to the keys. Both are very tropical while at the same time American but they also have a definite Hispanic flair. I leave being very glad I decided to keep up with my blog, there’s no way I’d be able to remember it all without having it written down. But now, I can relive it anytime I wish.

Breath taking views of the Atlantic from Yokahu tower
Breath taking views of the Atlantic from Yokahu tower
Bioluminescent glow (best picture I could get)
Bioluminescent glow (best picture I could get)
Into the Mangrove forest
Into the Mangrove forest
Ready for our bioluminescence trip
Ready for our bioluminescence trip
Parque de Las Croabas
Parque de Las Croabas
Punta Santiago Beach
Punta Santiago Beach

image

Coastline at Punta Santiago
Coastline at Punta Santiago
Creek leading to La Mina
Creek leading to La Mina

image

Yokahu observation tower
Yokahu observation tower
Yokahu tower
Yokahu tower
la Mina falls
la Mina falls
La Coca falls
La Coca falls
On the way to La Mina
On the way to La Mina
Our Jeep for the day
Our Jeep for the day
View all the way through the visitors center
View all the way through the visitors center
At Yokahu tower
At Yokahu tower
La Mina falls
La Mina falls
Our hostess-  Ana
Our hostess- Ana
Hiking at El Yunque
Hiking at El Yunque
Sunset in the secluded bioluminescent lagoon
Sunset in the secluded bioluminescent lagoon
Selfie fun
Selfie fun

May 26 – “On earth there is no heaven, but there are pieces of it” Jules Renard

Today would be our most adventurous and busiest day in Puerto Rico, and today we would glimpse a few of those pieces of heaven on earth. They are found in nature of course, God’s own handiwork.

After our scrumptious continental breakfast and coffee made by our wonderful hostess Ana, we found a cab to take us to the airport to pick up our rental car. You never know what you’re going to get with cab rides. This time our driver seemed to be taking on the role of Puerto Rican thug. He sat so low in his seat that from directly behind him, I had an unobstructed view out the front windshield (which was not necessarily a good thing). He was on his cell phone the entire trip, speaking in rapid fire Spanish. That lasted until we approached the airport, he then said (in clear English), “let me call you back- I’m lost.” What?! How does a cab driver get lost at the airport? And why did he choose to say only that in English? He explained that they have moved the car rental agencies recently, so he was confused. Right. But he finally deposited us in the right spot. We went inside and claimed the Jeep Wrangler we had reserved.

Fortunately, since Puerto Rico is a US territory, we could use our cell phones without extra change which meant we could use our maps app to guide us to the rain forest. Unfortunately, we would soon find out that our map did not seem to know where the visitors center was. Once out of San Juan we were quickly passing through towns nestled between heavily forested mountains. We took an exit when the map suggested and took what turned out to be a scenic 45 minute detour through winding mountain roads. We saw some great scenery, but when we finally found someone to ask, he told us we were in the wrong area of the national forest. We then actually starting using directions from an article I had printed out and brought with us. We haven’t used written directions in a while, but they were infinitely more helpful in this situation.

El Yunque (pronounced ell June-kaye) is a nationally protected rain forest, actually the only one on US soil. It is also on the list of the world’s 7 wonders of nature. We stopped first in the visitors center, which was itself a beautiful building with exhibits designed to teach about the rainforest ecosystem. We also grabbed a sandwich at the snack bar. Our next stop was the information desk for maps to the park and hiking trails. We set off in our jeep to see the beauty we were promised at the visitors center.

Our first stop as we ascended the mountain was La Coca falls. It was a high cliff face right beside the road. We were able to pick our way through boulders to get a closer view of the beautiful falls. Although very tall, there were only small streams of water flowing over the fall thanks to recent drought like conditions in Puerto Rico. The thick canopy of trees only added to the beauty and I quickly fell in love with El Yunque. We seemed to be in an enchanted forest where we heard calls of birds and water rushing over rocks and gazed at trees and flowers as far as the eye could see. Our next stop was an old observation tower. We climbed the 8-story tall structure and were rewarded with an absolutely breathtaking view. Not only could we see rain forest covered mountains, we also had a panoramic view of the Atlantic Ocean. We could even makes out tiny white caps just past the tall buildings visible along the coastline. The blue of the sky almost blended with the color of the ocean, the blue being only a few shades lighter as the eye traveled upward. I could have stayed and enjoyed that view for the rest of the day, but we had more to explore. Our next stop would take us to a hiking trail to the La Mina falls. We parked above the falls and hiked about 40 minutes down the side of the mountain to reach the falls. The trail primarily consisted of steps made into the side of the mountain broken up by a thin trail made of stone and concrete. The infrastructure of this rain forest was already a far cry from the one we visited in Belize. The hike toward the falls took us along the creek which would feed the fall. The creek flowing sharply downhill over large boulders was beautiful in its own right, and we stopped several times for pictures and to climb out onto the rocks. We knew we were approaching the falls as the sound of rushing water increased and as we stepped from behind a stand of trees we saw the clearing where the waterfall fell majestically into the pool below. We were not the only hikers here today, and the pool below the fall was full of people enjoying the spectacular view and the chilly water. We stayed only for a few minutes to take in the view. A 40 minute hike down the mountain meant a “slightly” more challenging trip going back up. Might as well get started. We mostly kept up a good pace on what felt like 6,000 steps we had to climb. The sections that were merely sharp inclines became a welcome relief between steps, and the rocks alongside the narrow path became a place to rest as we let hikers descending have the right of way (it was less about being kind as it was about catching our breath). We finally made it back to the parking area in a little less time than it took to get down. We were tired but the glow from the experience of the rain forest made it all worthwhile. We drove the remaining few kilometers to the end of the road, from here you could hike a couple of hours to the summit, a feat which we (thankfully) did not have time for. We made our way slowly back down the mountain and back onto the small highway along the eastern coast. We had a little time before we were scheduled to be in Los Croabas, which was less than 15 miles away, so we decided to ride along the coast and see another town. We rode to Punta Santiago and wove our way through the small roads of a town that did not seem have been touched by tourism. We stopped at the beach area which was only occupied by a few families. A thin line of sea grass formed a wavy line along the palm tree-lined beach. The water, while indeed blue, was a deep color and not the turquoise associated with the Caribbean. This eastern side of the island is technically on the Atlantic, but we were getting closer to the Caribbean as we headed southeast. After a few pictures, we headed back to Fajardo to find something to eat. After grabbing a quick bite we were off to Los Croabas and the bioluminescence lagoon.

Once we found our way to the lagoon it took a few minutes to find Bio Island- the company we booked with. Mostly kayaks are allowed by 10 licensed kayak companies but 2 companies are licensed to take motorized boats. From what I understand they were the first 2 who found a way to make boats work in the water that can be as shallow as 18 inches and no more license were given after those 2. Having read horror stories about hundreds of inexperienced kayakers paddling through a narrow mangrove lined canal in the dark, I chose the boat. Our guide Mario was very knowledgeable and soon had us well-informed about dinoflagellates. When we started our trip on the small flat bottom 6 passenger boat the sun was just beginning to set. We headed for a narrow canal in between thick mangroves. The shallow water, while not particularly blue, was crystal clear and we could see large tarpon swimming near the protection of the tangled mangrove roots. We entered what felt like a tunnel of trees, so close in some places that I wondered if our boat would be able to get through. Mario took the time to explain that the dinoflagellates were microscopic organisms that are photosynthetic and so in the shallow water here they absorb light all day. When they are disturbed they put off a glow as a defense mechanism. These organisms can be found in many places but typically the concentration of them is too low to detect the light with human eye. Here, however, it is because of the unique way the mangroves isolate the lagoon that the concentration has become very high (about 750,000 of them per gallon of water). After the sun sets the glow can be seen whenever the water is disturbed. It last only a few seconds so the water must be disturbed over and over to continue to see the glow. After Mario’s explanation we were even more excited to see them. The boat finally emerged into a lagoon roughly round in shape, measuring about half a mile in diameter. The groups of kayaks had all retreated to various spots near the entrance to the canal, but since we were in a motorized boat, we continued further into the lagoon. Thick mangroves surrounded us with taller Palm trees visible behind them. The sun had just set and the sky was still brilliant with oranges and pinks silhouetting the distant Palm trees. Very soon it was almost completely dark and long poles were passed out to us so we could disturb the water. We all began swirling our poles in the water and the excitement was palpable as we all “oohed” and “aahed” in amazement. My camera was able to capture a decent image and Mario explained that it is a hard thing for cameras to capture except on very particular settings. Everywhere we dipped our pole into the water an explosion of neon blue light suddenly surrounded it. The boat moved slowly through the lagoon as we took in the awesome sight. The captain invited us to lean down and try the same thing with our hands, and when I splashed in the water and quickly withdrew my hand, drops of glowing water that lasted only a second ran through my fingers. When it was finally time to head back toward the canal, Mario stemmed our disappointment at leaving with a promise of yet another perspective of the dinoflagellates in the canal. Once inside the mangrove lined canal where no moonlight could penetrate because of the trees, the glow became brighter and water splashed up in the air with a paddle would glow like a neon blue fountain. As I turned to look behind the boat there was a large glowing circle following us as the motor churned the water. Just when we thought we could not possibly be amazed any further, Mario pointed out small white dots of light in the mangrove trees themselves. What we were seeing were bugs called click beetles whose eyes actually glow! (I’ve since looked all this up, and it is indeed all true even though it sounds like fiction.) Christian spotted movement in the water and the captain followed the large stingray he had spotted with his flashlight as he glided beside the water right alongside our boat. Mario used his flashlight to show us several giant iguanas living in the mangrove trees. Emerging from the canal was like coming out of a dream. Did we really just see glowing water? This may be one of the most unbelievable things I’ve ever seen, really because it doesn’t fit in with what I thought I knew about water. Although I’ve heard of this place before, I had somehow imagined the glow would be faint or at least certainly not spectacular neon blue!

After getting off the boat, we made our way back to our jeep in the dark. We all agreed this had been the a great day, seeing all these amazing things in nature makes you think about the endless creativity of God and the magnificence of it all.

Tomorrow is the day everyone dreads, the end of vacation and a long day of travel. But somehow this trip has been so wonderful that even the arduous day of travel ahead can’t curb my excitement. This has been a week we won’t soon forget.

Puerto Rico has been a pleasant surprise to me. The rainforest, the bioluminescent lagoon, Old San Juan, the beaches, and the impressive fortress were all amazing. And according to locals, this is only the tip if the iceberg when it comes to what there is to do here. The sprawling city of San Juan surprised me with its metropolitan area population of 2 1/2 million. San Juan and the small towns outside of it remind me of Miami and the small towns leading to the keys. Both are very tropical while at the same time American but they also have a definite Hispanic flair. I leave being very glad I decided to keep up with my blog, there’s no way I’d be able to remember it all without having it written down. But now, I can relive it anytime I wish.

Breath taking views of the Atlantic from the tower
Breath taking views of the Atlantic from the tower
Bioluminescent glow (best I could get)
Bioluminescent glow (best I could get)

image

image

On the way to La Mina
On the way to La Mina
Coastline at Punta Santiago
Coastline at Punta Santiago
Sunset in the secluded bioluminescent lagoon
Sunset in the secluded bioluminescent lagoon
Into the Mangrove forest
Into the Mangrove forest
Ready for our bioluminescence trip
Ready for our bioluminescence trip
Parque de Las Croabas
Parque de Las Croabas
Exploring Los Coabas
Exploring Los Croabas

image

Punta Santiago Beach
Punta Santiago Beach
La Mina falls
La Mina falls
La Coca falls
La Coca falls
Hiking at El Yunque
Hiking at El Yunque
Tower with a view
Tower with a view
Selfie fun
Selfie fun
Views from the visitors center
Views from the visitors center
Our hostess Ana
Our hostess Ana
Yokahu observation tower
Yokahu observation tower
Our Jeep for the day
Our Jeep for the day